


Front Row at the Gongshow

by ThrillingDetectiveTales



Category: The Pacific (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hockey, Chatlogs, Coming Out, Gen, M/M, Non-Traditional Fic Format, Transcripts, found document fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-06-14
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:06:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24322495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThrillingDetectiveTales/pseuds/ThrillingDetectiveTales
Summary: [Excerpt from Deadspin]"You all remember Eddie Jones, right? The corn-fed captain of the New Orleans Rougarou so wholesome he belongs on a box of Malt-O-Meal? The gentleman bruiser who spends his free time playing country tunes for kids with cancer?Our favorite dapper D-man led his team to 97 points last night in a shut-out victory against the Los Angeles Kings, clinching a playoff spot for the first time in franchise history. Oh! And he also got caught on camera at the after-party, sucking face. WITH A DUDE."(Or: the "accidentally outed" hockey AU that nobody asked for.)
Relationships: Andrew A. "Ack-Ack" Haldane/Edward "Hillbilly" Jones
Comments: 56
Kudos: 58





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Awhile back I started talking about writing a hockey AU, and loads of folks on the **Heavy Artillery** server were enthusiastic enough about the idea that not only did I decide to go through with it, I'm flinging myself full-speed out of my comfort zone and delivering a "found document" style story told entirely through news articles, tweets, chat logs, texts, podcast transcripts, op-eds, sticky notes, and a variety of other non-traditional media.
> 
> I had lofty goals of doing up graphics to make everything pretty, but ultimately decided that might hinder the experience for folks who use screen-readers and the like.
> 
> This story takes place in a fictional universe where coronavirus didn't happen, during the 19-20 NHL season (which I've taken some liberties with) in a league that has 35 teams in it instead of just 31.* While I use names of actual NHL hockey players and hockey-adjacent celebrities in a couple of places, I want to stress that this is not hockey RPF. Not that there's anything wrong with that, just, if it's what you're here for, you're going to leave disappointed.
> 
> I'm done with writing the meat of the content, but formatting this thing is a beast, so I'm posting it in chapters to try and motivate myself to actually get it done and posted. Not beta-read because it wouldn't make a lot of sense without said formatting, so all mistakes are mine. As always, feedback is very much appreciated.
> 
> For those of you who are wondering, a "gongshow" is defined as: 'a hockey game that has gotten out of control with ridiculous fights, goals or other crazy events.' It seemed apropros, since that's basically what Eddie's life becomes right at the outset of this fic.
> 
> Enjoy!

[Trending Story: Deadspin]  
  
**EDDIE JONES HAS A GAY OLD TIME ON BOURBON STREET**

Scott Weinshenker  
12/09/19 6:03 AM - Filed to: NOT A DRILL

You all remember Eddie Jones, right? The corn-fed captain of the New Orleans Rougarou so wholesome he belongs on a box of Malt-O-Meal? The gentleman bruiser who spends his free time playing country tunes for kids with cancer?

Our favorite dapper D-man led his team to 97 points last night in a shut-out victory against the Los Angeles Kings, clinching a playoff spot for the first time in franchise history. Oh! And he also got caught on camera at the after-party, sucking face. WITH A DUDE.

A bystander on Bourbon Street captured video of Jones out on the town after the Rougarou’s big win, and in the arms of another man, to boot. The clip is only about twenty seconds long, but it shows a pristine picture of Jones going toe-to-toe (or rather, tongue-to-tongue) in an impressive game of tonsil hockey with a salt-and-pepper hottie outside of popular downtown NoLa nightspot, Jack Beverly’s. Don’t believe me? ~~See for yourself:~~

It has come to our attention that the original video has (tragedy of tragedies) been pulled down. There are undoubtedly bootleg copies still circulating—the internet lives forever, after all—but for those of you not up to the search, let me lay out a highlight reel:

Jones goes full frontal for the camera about twelve seconds in, when he pulls back from the Olympic-grade lip lock to gaze tenderly into his anonymous paramour's eyes. It’s clearly him, complete with the stitches on his left cheek that he earned taking a stick to the face five minutes into the third period of last night’s game, when he basically tackled Tanner Pearson to the ice to prevent the Kings from scoring a breakaway goal. The mystery man doesn’t let Jones stay away for long, but it’s evidence enough to confirm that Eddie Jones is at least bi-curious. (Though the unapologetic handful of ass he grabs for himself just before the clip cuts off suggests a certain familiarity that only comes through regular practice, in this reporter's humble opinion.) No word yet on the identity of the silver fox crowding Jones up against the cobblestones, but based on his hip-to-shoulder ratio alone, it’s no wonder Jones succumbed to his charms.

This controversy comes on the tail end of several major developments for the Rougarou, who experienced a change in management last August when Andrew “Ack Ack” Haldane came aboard as coach, a short two years after his early retirement shocked the League. Under his expert tutelage—and with a little help from newly-acquired Southern belle of the NHL, Auburn University's star center and first-round draft pick, Eugene Sledge—the Rougarou have become real contenders. They're headed to the Stanley Cup playoffs for the first time time since the club was established in 1994, and this gay sports fan, for one, would hate to see Jones’s accidental outing become the speed bump that runs them off the road to victory.

Neither Jones himself nor New Orleans Rougarou management have been available for comment on the matter so far, but one thing goes without saying: assuming that Jones doesn’t fully implode in the aftermath of this incident, it has the potential to change the landscape of professional ice hockey as we know it. At the very least, I hope to see Jones (and his broad-shouldered beaux!) in attendance at next year’s Southern Decadence. Maybe this time, he'll even ditch the "secret agent in a star-studded summer blockbuster" disguise he was wearing last year and admit he was there.

> **[MISSED CALL: NABHITHA KHATRI to EDWARD JONES]**  
>  _Straight to voicemail, December 9, 2019 at 6:22 AM_  
>    
>  Hello, Mr. Jones. This is Nabhitha Khatri, the Rougarou’s Director of Public Relations. I apologize for calling so early, but there is a matter of some consequence we must discuss. Please call me back as soon as you can. Thank you.

**"Gunny" Haney:** Shit kid, you couldn’t have given me a little warning?  
_December 9 at 6:32 AM_

**From:** Nabhitha Khatri  
**To:** “Lewis ‘Chesty’ Puller” _(pullerl@nolarougarouhockey.com),_ “Annabelle Gwan” _(gwan@nolarougarouhockey.com)_  
**CC:** “Jay De L’eau” _(deleau@nolarougarouhockey.com),_ “Liesl Hewitt” _(hewitt5@nolarougarouhockey.com),_ “Monica Pham” _(monica@bep-law.com),_ “Gunny Haney” _(e.haney@oldbreedmgmt.com),_ “Declan Findlay” _(findlay2@nhlpa.com)_  
Today at 6:46 AM

 **Subject:** ‼️ OPEN IMMEDIATELY ‼️

Chesty, Anna:  
  
One of my social media interns has just informed me that there was purported video footage of Edward Jones engaging in sexual behavior with another man (currently unidentified) posted to Twitter very early this morning. While the video itself was removed shortly after it was uploaded, the thread has since been picked up by Deadspin and is likely to hit more major media outlets within the hour.  
  
I have attempted to contact Mr. Jones, both to verify the authenticity of the video in question and to request his presence in person to establish a responsive media strategy, but was unable to get through to his cell. We have a handful of avenues currently open to our exploration, but a few of them are at risk of closing down as the clock ticks on. As it is Mr. Jones’s privacy that has been disregarded, it is of course non-negotiable that he be a key voice in developing our approach, but we are dealing with several matters which require immediate and decisive action, both to protect Mr. Jones’s personal welfare and the integrity of this institution.  
  
I’ve blocked out the morning for an emergency conference starting at eight o’clock, and have invited Mr. Jones’s agent, Elmo Haney, his legal counsel, Monica Pham, and Mr. Declan Findlay, a representative from the NHLPA, to attend remotely so that they may help ensure Mr. Jones’s personal needs are satisfied over the course of this delicate negotiation. I have cleared my own calendar for the remainder of the week, and asked your assistants to clear you both for the day.  
  
I apologize for the presumption, but I trust you understand how important it is to develop a media strategy and implement it before this narrative spirals beyond our control. I appreciate your haste and support in this matter and look forward to seeing you both at the eight AM briefing, God willing with Mr. Jones in tow. Should you need anything, I will be in the office by seven and available via cell until then.  


Nabhitha Khatri  
Director of Public Relations  
New Orleans Rougarou Hockey Club  
_Bienvenue á la fais-do-Rou!_

> **[MISSED CALL: NABHITHA KHATRI to EDWARD JONES]**  
>  _Straight to voicemail, December 9, 2019 at 6:52 AM_  
>    
>  Hello again, Mr. Jones. It’s Nabhitha. I’m not trying to alarm you, but it is paramount that you call me back as soon as possible. There’s been a minor media incident that we need to address before the narrative is out of our hands, and I would like you to come into the office at your earliest convenience to discuss options. I've called for a meeting with myself, management, legal, your agent, and a few other relevant parties for eight o'clock. I understand that this is incredibly short notice, but I hope to see you there. In the meantime, I'll be available at this number at any time, so give me a call as soon as you can, alright? Thanks. 

> **[MISSED CALL: CHESTY PULLER to EDWARD JONES]**  
>  _Straight to voicemail, December 9, 2019 at 6:55 AM_  
>    
>  Eddie, hey, it's Chesty Puller. Look, there's been a uh - a bit of a media snafu. The team wants to get a response out fast so we can stay on top of things, and we'd like you to come in and give your input on our plan of attack. I believe you've already heard from our PR Director, Nabhitha. You can ring her or myself as soon as you're up, but light a fire under it, alright kid? We've gotta move on this before it's out of our hands, for all our sakes. Oh, and uh - Eddie. I, uh - I just want to let you know, the team has your back. You're a great player, an excellent captain and we're lucky to have you on our roster. We're with you, so don't - don't worry about any of that, alright? Okay. Call me.

**Ralph:** Hey big brother, you okay?  
_December 9 at 6:58 AM_

> **[MISSED CALL: CHESTY PULLER to ANDREW HALDANE]**  
>  _December 9, 2019 at 7:01 AM_  
>    
>  Hey there, Ack Ack, Chesty Puller calling. Apologies for the hour, but I need to get a hold of Hillbilly, ASAP, and I figured you might know where to hunt him down. We've got a bit of a media thing happening—nothing to worry about, we've got everything under control for the moment, but we want to make sure it stays that way and time is of the essence. If you could - oh, well, you're calling me back right now. Never mind all this, then, son. Talk to you in a second.

**From:** Lewis “Chesty” Puller  
**To:** “Nabhitha Khatri” _(khatri@nolarougarouhockey.com),_ “Annabelle Gwan” _(gwananna@nolarougarouhockey.com)_  
**CC:** “Jay De L’eau” _(deleau@nolarougarouhockey.com),_ “Liesl Hewitt” _(hewitt2@nolarougarouhockey.com)_  
Today at 7:08 AM  
  
Subject: Re: ‼️ OPEN IMMEDIATELY ‼️  
  
Nabhitha: Thank you for the quick turnaround on action. I sent one of the boys over to collect Mr. Jones and expect he’ll be delivered promptly.  
  
Anna: Be ready to talk fast, mean legal recourse—no pulling punches. I want the vultures over at Deadspin running scared for the rest of their natural born lives. Sending Jay for doughnuts and coffee on his way in. Text him your order if you’ve got one. I get the feeling we’re all going to need it.  
  
Chesty Puller  
General Manager  
New Orleans Rougarou Hockey Club

**Mary:** Shit, Ed, I just saw  
_December 9 at 8:23 AM_  
  
**Mary:** People are such unbelievable assholes  
_December 9 at 8:23 AM_  
  
**Mary:** Call me when you can  
_December 9 at 8:23 AM_  
  
**Mary:** Love you bro  
_December 9 at 8:37 AM_

**Ashleigh Adams** _@officialashads_  
  
So apparently _@Hillbilly33_ is gay??? Fuck my entire life. 😭 #allthegoodones  
  
8:44 AM - 9 December 2019  
216 Retweets, 438 Likes

[Whatsapp Group Chat Log, from the iPhone of R. V. Burgin]  
**AWOO MOTHERPUCKERS**  
Bill, Tony, Hamm, Eugene, Snafu, You  
  
  
**Peck**  
Holy shit, boys, you seein this?  
_9:17 AM_  
  
**Burgin**  
Seeing what?  
_9:17 AM_  
  
**Snafu**  
????  
_9:17 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
Hillbilly’s a fuckin homo  
_9:18 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
https://deadspin.com/eddie-jones-has-a-gay-old-time-on-bour-6544702134  
_9:18 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
It’s all over the news  
_9:18 AM_  
  
**Snafu**  
what  
_9:18 AM_  
  
**Snafu**  
best watch that tone kathy  
_9:18 AM_  
  
**Burgin**  
Son of a bitch.  
_9:19 AM_  
  
**Leyden**  
Fuckin' A  
_9:19 AM_  
  
**Hamm**  
Good for him  
_9:19 AM_  
  
**Sledge**  
Is it true?  
_9:19 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
Looks pretty true to me  
_9:20 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
I don’t think you suck face with other dudes like that unless you’re certified homo  
_9:20 AM_  
  
**Snafu**  
so what if it is true  
_9:21 AM_  
  
**Leyden**  
Pecker's just jealous cuz he ain't got a chance  
_9:21 AM_  
  
**Leyden**  
Hillbilly's out of his league  
_9:21 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
Gross dude  
_9:21 AM_  
  
**Sledge**  
I didn’t mean it like that.  
_9:22 AM_  
  
**Sledge**  
I don’t care if he’s gay. I just didn’t know, is all.  
_9:22 AM_  
  
**Sledge**  
Doesn’t seem very fair, a glorified tabloid catching him out before he said anything himself  
_9:23 AM_  
  
**Hamm**  
Yeah sux  
_9:23 AM_  
  
**Leyden**  
Total bullshit  
_9:23 AM_  
  
**Burgin**  
That’s Deadspin for you.  
_9:24 AM_  
  
**Snafu**  
welcome 2 the show sledgehammer  
_9:24 AM_  
  
**Snafu**  
no secrets up here  
_9:24 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
Seriously does nobody care that our captain is smoking the pork pipe???? Like???  
_9:27 AM_  
  
**Snafu**  
son what year u livin in?  
_9:27 AM_  
  
**Burgin**  
I don’t see why it matters.  
_9:27 AM_  
  
**Sledge**  
Same  
_9:27 AM_  
  
**Hamm**  
My bro’s gay so I’m used to it  
_9:27 AM_  
  
**Burgin**  
None of our business anyway.  
_9:27 AM_  
  
**Burgin**  
Certainly none of yours, Peck.  
_9:28 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
Jesus alright  
_9:28 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
I guess I’m the only asshole caught off-guard  
_9:28 AM_  
  
**Snafu**  
looks like  
_9:28 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
Fuck you Snaf  
_9:28 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
Fuckin sue me for being weirded out  
_9:29 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
We get naked in front of this guy on the daily  
_9:29 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
what if he was like, watching us this whole time??  
_9:29 AM_  
  
**Hamm**  
That’s reeeaaally not how it works, man  
_9:30 AM_  
  
**Snafu**  
think u safe w that pisspoor excise 4 a cocktail sausage u got in ur shorts kathy  
_9:30 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
Sorry I’m not a fucking expert in gay dudeology  
_9:30 AM_  
  
**Snafu**  
excuse*  
_9:30 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
FUCK YOU SNAF  
_9:30 AM_  
  
**Snafu**  
all this talk bout fuckin me, u sure u aint gay?  
_9:31 AM_  
  
_**PECK** is typing..._  
  
**Burgin**  
ENOUGH  
_9:31 AM_  
  
**Burgin**  
Our team takes allegations of sexual misconduct very seriously, as it does its commitment to inclusivity and tolerance.  
_9:31 AM_  
  
**Burgin**  
You have an actual complaint to register about the Captain, Tony, you take it to Coach or you bring it to HR, otherwise get over yourself. We don’t need that shit on the ice with us.  
_9:31 AM_  
  
**Hamm**  
👏👏👏  
_9:31 AM_  
  
**Leyden**  
And that’s why Burgie wears the A  
_9:32 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
Fine, sorry  
_9:32 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
Fuck me, I guess  
_9:32 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
Didn’t know everyone was gonna whip out the rainbow flags right away  
_9:32 AM_  
  
**Sledge**  
🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈  
_9:32 AM_  
  
**Hamm**  
😂😂  
_9:32 AM_  
  
**Snafu**  
u tell im sledgehammer  
_9:33 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
You’re all assholes  
_9:33 AM_  
  
**Snafu**  
least we aint homophobes  
_9:33 AM_  
  
**Burgin**  
Snafu, can it.  
_9:33 AM_  
  
**Peck**  
🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕  
_9:33 AM_  
  
**Burgin**  
Peck, walk away.  
_9:33 AM_

**Todd Bronus** _@big_beefy_  
  
Gays always say they want equality then pull stunts like this. So disappointing. Hey _@Hillbilly33_ let’s keep the focus on the season instead of personal drama!!!  
  
9:48 AM - 9 December 2019  
4.5K Retweets, 6.2K Likes

> **[MISSED CALL: "MAMA" JONES to EDWARD JONES]**  
>  _Straight to voicemail, December 9, 2019 at 10:42 AM_  
>    
>  Hi, Eddie, honey. It’s mom. Your sister called and told me the news. I just can’t believe that anyone would be so disrespectful of your right to privacy in this day and age. It’s a damn disgrace and they ought to be ashamed of themselves, every last one of them. Airing your personal business as if they have any right. I can’t hardly imagine what you’re going through right now, sweetheart, but I just wanted to call and remind you that your family is out here and we love you, okay? Always, no matter what. Call me when you’re finished navigating the floodwaters, alright? I’d like to hear your voice. And give Andrew our love. We’re praying for you both. Okay, honey, talk to you soon. Love you. Bye.

**HOCKEY CENTRAL PODCAST**  
**December 9: "A Bunch of Washed-Up Nobodies"**  


> Jeff is joined by Anthony Stewart and NHL On Sportsnet’s Brian Burke for the full two hours. They kick off the show discussing bombshell news out of New Orleans. Then, the Wild are riding a hot streak and Head Coach Bruce Boudreau took some time to join the show (46:22). Milan Lucic scores his first goal and the Flames look like they are back on the right track (1:03:12). Brian answers questions for #HeyBurkie (1:27:45).  
>    
>  The views and opinions expressed in this podcast are those of the hosts and guests and do not necessarily reflect the position of Rogers Media Inc. or any affiliate.

[TRANSCRIPT]  
  
INTRO V.O.: [over energetic theme riff] This is Hockey Central, with Jeff Marek, Brian Burke, and Anthony Stewart, on SportsNet 590, "The Fan."  
  
JEFF MAREK: Lot to talk about today, boys. Lot to talk about. The Minnesota Wild are riding a hot streak. The Flames look like they might've turned things around.  
  
BRIAN BURKE: [behind] Finally.  
  
MAREK: Finally, yes, after a bit of a nosedive there just after Thanksgiving. But the biggest news today by far is a fan video that went viral on social media early this morning, reportedly "outing" Eddie Jones, captain of the New Orleans Rougarou, in the process. Lots of questions on everyone's minds -  
  
STEWART: [behind] Yeah, I'll say.  
  
MAREK: - from the video's authenticity to speculation about the NHL's response. No word from the team yet, or from Jones himself, though we're expecting to see a statement within the hour. Anthony Stewart, seems like you have some thoughts on this one. You want to start us off?  
  
STEWART: I don't know that I'd call them "thoughts."  
  
MAREK, BURKE: [laughing]  
  
BURKE: Yeah, not real familiar with those, are you, Stewie?  
  
STEWART: [laughing] No.  
  
BURKE: [behind] Not your strong point.  
  
STEWART: Yeah, no, try not to have too many of those. Uh, no, I just think - they're not really thoughts yet at this point, y'know? This is - there's just so much to unpack with this one, mostly right now it's just a shock to the system. A big shock. Not that there are gay players in the league, I think that's something everybody's kind of known even if it hasn't really been acknowledged the way it should. Even just statistically speaking, I don't think it comes to anybody as that big a surprise -  
  
BURKE: [behind] Yeah, no, not at all.  
  
STEWART: - but the thing that's kind of jarring me, on this one, is - it's the suddenness of it. The disrespect for a player's personal privacy. I mean, we're all used to the - the celebrity of hockey, right?  
  
MAREK: [behind] Sure, sure.  
  
STEWART: There's a certain amount of that that comes with being an elite athlete on the pro circuit, a certain amount of fame. You're in the public eye, y'know? And you expect a certain amount of scrutiny, from fans, or from the press. But I think in this case, it's a situation where that celebrity had the potential to backfire in a big way and it kind of did. I mean, you gotta be a little pissed off on Jones's behalf, y'know? Like, I can't even imagine what I would do in his shoes, if someone aired an aspect of my life that I considered to be personal and private, and then you wake up one morning and the whole world feels entitled to comment on it.  
  
MAREK: Opinions on this one do seem to be flying pretty fast and loose . Lotta folks on social media weighing in, couple of op-eds out already from a few of the national news outlets.  
  
BURKE: Bunch of washed-up nobodies in a recording studio in downtown Toronto talking about it all morning.  
  
STEWART: [laughing] Yeah, right. Really. I mean, seriously, though, what do we know about it? What do we know about any of this? We’re all - I don't want to make assumptions, but, to the best of my knowledge, we're a bunch of straight dudes sitting around the table here talking about a potentially gay player being outed. We don’t know anything about this. The only of use who has any experience with coming out, so far as I know, is you Burkie.  
  
BURKE: Yeah, it's a hard thing. A scary thing, for a lot of people. I raised my kids to be open, you know, to be uh - accepting of others. And I like to flatter myself that I did a pretty good job showing them I'd always be accepting of them, and it was still hard. It was still hard for Brendan to come out to us, even though he _knew_ we supported him no matter what. It was even harder when he decided he wanted to come out publicly, but you know, we had his back. There was a lot of discussion at that time, too, even in the international press, but that was ten years ago. I'd like to think we could do a little bit better now.  
  
STEWART: Right. Absolutely, I hope we can do better. I mean, I think we all understand that this is something that’s never happened within the NHL before. It could be a huge hiccup in Jones's career, and y’know, even aside from that, it's clearly not something he planned for, but I think the overall tone right now, coming from the press and from social media and even coming from some of the fans, is uh - honestly, it's a little disheartening in a league that's working to make itself more progressive and more tolerant. Whether he - however he identifies, whether he's gay or bisexual or whether it was some big misunderstanding or whatever the case may be, it's frustrating to see some of these fans and especially some of these media outlets latch onto the whole situation as some big scandal when it's really not anybody's business.  
  
MAREK: See, Stewie, that raises the question for me—when a player's public conduct has an impact on the overall well-being of their team, does it become everybody’s business?  
  
STEWART: Well -  
  
MAREK: When a player is reported for making inappropriate advances or when a player engages in conduct unbecoming as a figurehead for the team they represent, those kinds of incidents get reported, internally and oftentimes to the media as well, and they become everybody's business.  
  
STEWART: Right.  
  
MAREK: Or so Twitter would lead me to believe.  
  
BURKE: Oh yeah, everyone on Twitter's an expert. Doctor, lawyer, professor, you name it.  
  
MAREK: Now, I'll grant you, this is a different situation –  
  
STEWART: [top] This is a _completely_ different situation! This isn't a player assaulting a cabbie over some loose change or losing half their salary playing poker or a - a player consistently showing up in the tabloids being tossed out of bars. I haven't seen the video myself. It’s Jones’s business and I didn't want to add to that hit count, but from what I gather, Jones wasn't doing anything different than any other guy out celebrating a win with his buddies might've been doing if he ran across someone he liked on a night out on the town. It's the fact that it's another man in the video that's drawing everyone's attention and that's, y'know, that's a problem. Especially in our community, that's a problem.  
  
MAREK: What do you think, Brian Burke?  
  
BURKE: Well, you know, this is a hard one. This is a real hard one. And it’s not hard because I think Eddie Jones did anything wrong, I want to be real clear about that before I say anything else. Where I’m sitting, Jones is fully in the clear, alright? Could he have been a little more discreet? Yeah, maybe.  
  
MAREK: Sure. But who among us hasn't had that night?  
  
STEWART: [laughing, behind] Oh, yeah, we've all been there.  
  
BURKE: [laughing] Who among us, yeah, exactly my point. Every single one of us has gone out with the guys after a big one, had a couple beers, made some bad decisions.  
  
STEWART: Yeah, I've got a couple of those under my own belt.  
  
MAREK: You and me both.  
  
BURKE: Not that - I don't think this _was_ a bad decision that Jones made, necessarily. It's not a - uh, an aspect of the culture we talk about a lot, but I think it's a pretty normal one, guys—especially these young guys—wanting to go out and pick up after a game. That sort of thing is a lot more casual than it used to be. It comes standard with these guys, and Eddie Jones wanting to take advantage of that isn't any different than any other guy wanting to take advantage of it. I think Stewie's right that the only reason Jones is making these kinds of ripples is because he happens to have been caught in the company of a man, and for a lot of people that’s a hard conversation to have. It shouldn't be hard, but is hard, and where it _gets_ hard is out here, in the court of public opinion. Lot of people are gonna have opinions on this one. Lot of them already do, and - look, hockey's old school. The NHL is old school. You know, I know it, and anyone who doesn't know it either doesn't have the perspective we do, playing for the league or coaching for the league, reporting on it. Or they're just being ignorant. Willfully ignorant. Hockey is old school, and it's a difficult institution to force.  
  
STEWART: Absolutely.  
  
BURKE: Change comes slow in the NHL, always has, and this situation puts the league in a position where they're looking some immediate change in the face and they have to respond. Preferably sooner rather than later, if they don't want to risk damaging their image or alienating a whole group of players that could be the future of the industry. Stewie mentioned about statistics, and you know, who’s to say that the next great first-round draft pick won’t be gay? We don’t know. This conversation is gonna help pave the way for that, no matter how the league responds, but it’s a question of - of yardage at this point, almost, right? How far down that road are they willing to go? Now, I don't know what the league’s response will be, and I don't care to speculate. It's not my place to try and figure what goes on in the minds of league execs.  
  
MAREK: Not itching to put yourself in Bettman's shoes there, Burkie?  
  
BURKE: Uh, no. No, and frankly, I'm a little afraid of what I might find if I tried.  
  
MAREK, STEWART: [laughing]  
  
BURKE: What I _do_ know is that Hockey is for Everyone exists. You Can Play exists. This kind of thing is exactly why Patrick started the organization. For a few years now the league has been very vocal in its support of minority groups and people and players from all kinds of backgrounds and sexual orientations, and depending on how Jones and the Rougarou decide to handle this - or, really, _regardless_ of how they choose to handle it, this seems like the moment where the NHL needs to put its money where its mouth is.  
  
MAREK: It’s time to put up, or shut up, I think is how the saying goes.  
  
BURKE: [laughing] Right, yes! Put up or shut up! You're either okay with gay players, or you're not. The real unfairness in all this, for my money, and what we’re seeing already with all this Twitter buzz and these blog posts, is that just by virtue of being the only player in this particular spotlight at this particular moment, Jones is going to be the measuring stick for that decision, for better or worse.  
  
MAREK: That's a lot of pressure to put on just one guy.  
  
BURKE: Oh it's an _incredible_ amount of pressure to put on one guy. Tremendous amount of pressure. But the NHL has a long history of that. We like our figureheads, in hockey. We like our stars, our - our poster boys. I mean, look at Sidney Crosby. Or - or Alex Ovechkin. Look at Gordie Howe, look at Gretzky. Look at all these guys who—even without the added nuance of a bigger social implication, they're the faces of hockey. They _are_ hockey, to a lot of people. That’s not an easy life, by any stretch, and Jones just got catapulted into it overnight. I can’t think of a single scarier thing than waking up tomorrow and somebody telling me, probably before I even have the time to get myself a cup of coffee, “Hey there Brian Burke! We’re gonna decide how the world should work for every sports newscaster out there based on your behavior over the next few weeks. Isn’t that great?”  
  
STEWART: [laughing] I think that scares all of us, there, Burkie.  
  
MAREK: [top, laughing] It sure scares me. Op! Looks like I’m gonna have to cut you off here for a second, fellas. We're just getting word that Rougarou GM Chesty Puller is about to issue a statement to the press. We'll come back and talk about it in just a second, but for now let's go live to New Orleans to hear what the Rougarou have to say.

> **New Orleans Rougarou Proud to Stand with Its Players**  
>  **FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE**  
>    
>  _New Orleans, LA - December 9, 2019:_ Chesty Puller, General Manager of the New Orleans Rougarou, released the following statement in response to a fan video featuring Edward Jones that was posted to Twitter this morning.  
>    
> 
>
>> “It is my honor to be here this morning, both as a representative of the New Orleans Rougarou Hockey Club, and as a one-time player and long-time lover of the game, to say decidedly and with conviction that the New Orleans Rougarou is and always will be proud to stand with its players. Our beautiful city is made richer for its blend of cultures and perspectives, and we have striven at every turn to embrace that same mentality in our locker room. Regardless of their nationalities or their religions, of their ethnicities, their sexualities, or their social backgrounds, every player on the New Orleans Rougarou roster has proven himself exceptional by every measure, and we are grateful to have each and every one of them.  
>    
>  Mr. Jones is our captain and the backbone of our team, and it is our privilege to support him in this trying time. While a statement from Mr. Jones himself will be forthcoming, we ask that fans and media alike respect his privacy and the privacy of all other parties involved.”
> 
>   
> 
> 
> Hailing from Red Lion, Pennsylvania, 27-year-old defenseman Edward Jones was originally drafted to the Minnesota Wild in the second round (52nd overall) of the 2012 NHL Draft, where he played nearly five full seasons before he was dealt to the New Orleans Rougarou on February 6, 2016. Named captain of the Rougarou in 2017 under first-time coach Andrew Haldane, Jones has continued to grow and thrive, scoring 61 points in 36 games this season alone. Jones's contributions—both to the New Orleans Rougarou and the sport of hockey as a whole—are abundant on and off the ice. Awarded Defenseman of the Year during his time with the North American Hockey League's Odessa Jackalopes, Jones is a favored candidate for the 2019-2020 James Norris Memorial Trophy and has seen past consideration for the Mark Messier Leadership Award.

**Mal McCullough** _@mistermac5_  
  
https://www.nhl.com/rougarou/news/new-orleans-rougarou-proud-to-stand/r-427001981 _@Hillbilly33 @RougarouHockey_ This is shameful. Lost yourselves a fan today.  
  
1:13 PM - 9 December 2019  
87 Retweets, 152 Likes

**From:** Declan Findlay  
**To:** “Edward Jones” _(countryjones33@gmail.com)_  
**CC:** "Morgan Roncone" _(morgan@youcanplayproject.org)_  
Today at 2:23 PM

 **Subject:** Useful resources.

Hey there, Eddie.  
  
It was a pleasure meeting you today, though of course I wish it was under better circumstances. I know things are looking pretty bleak right now, but you have a lot of people behind you on this one, myself included. I've attached a list of recommended sports psychologists who might be able to help you manage some of the stress you're currently experiencing. All thoroughly vetted by the NHLPA, of course.  
  
I CC'ed my buddy Morgan over at You Can Play, as they have their own roster of experienced mental health professionals who specialize in gender and sexuality, in case you'd be more comfortable talking to someone with that background.  
  
If there's anything else I can help you with, please don't hesitate to ask. The NHLPA exists to advocate on behalf of players like you, and we're happy to do so.  
  
All the best,  
Declan Findlay  


> [Post It note, found on the fridge in Edward Jone's sixth story apartment. December 9, 2019 at 4:36 PM]  
>    
> 
>
>> Take all the space you need. Just remember, I’m here whenever you want me.  
>  Love you.  
>    
>  Andy

[Jones Sibling Group Text Thread]  
  
**Edward:** Hey y'all  
_December 9 at 5:12 PM_  
  
**Mary:** Eddie!  
_December 9 at 5:12 PM_  
  
**Ralph:** About damn time brother  
_December 9 at 5:12 PM_  
  
**Ralph:** You okay?  
_December 9 at 5:12 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Okay as I can be  
_December 9 at 5:12 PM_  
  
**Mary:** I can't believe those Deadspin shitheads  
_December 9 at 5:12 PM_  
  
**Mary:** I hope you're planning to sue  
_December 9 at 5:13 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Got some other things to worry about first  
_December 9 at 5:13 PM_  
  
**Ralph:** Tell me the team isn't giving you shit  
_December 9 at 5:13 PM_  
  
**Edward:** No  
_December 9 at 5:13 PM_  
  
**Edward:** They've been great  
_December 9 at 5:13 PM_  
  
**Mary:** How's Andy holding up?  
_December 9 at 5:13 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Fine  
_December 9 at 5:13 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Worried  
_December 9 at 5:14 PM_  
  
**Edward:** We haven't really had time to talk  
_December 9 at 5:14 PM_  
  
**Ralph:** Glad you got him with you, brother  
_December 9 at 5:14 PM_  
  
**Mary:** Tell him we say hi  
_December 9 at 5:14 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Yeah  
_December 9 at 5:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Hey, tell mama I'll call her in the morning, will you?  
_December 9 at 5:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Not really up to much more discussion tonight  
_December 9 at 5:17 PM_  
  
**Ralph:** Sure thing  
_December 9 at 5:17 PM_  
  
**Mary:** Try to relax a little, ok?  
_December 9 at 5:17 PM_  
  
**Mary:** This too shall pass  
_December 9 at 5:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Yeah, maybe  
_December 9 at 5:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Love you both  
_December 9 at 5:18 PM_  
  
**Mary:** Love you Eds  
_December 9 at 5:18 PM_  
  
**Ralph:** You too  
_December 9 at 5:18 PM_  



	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go! After an ENTIRE DAY of formatting, we are finally ready for chapter two.
> 
> May I say before anything that I absolutely didn't expect to receive such a positive response to this fic, so I'm deeply flattered and very pleased that y'all are enjoying it. I will get back to comments ASAP but priority one is wrangling the HTML on the rest of this beast so that we can all come a (hopefully happy) conclusion.
> 
> I thiiiink we're looking at two more chapters after this, but it might wind up being three depending on how much formatting I want to do over the new few days. Anyway it should all be up soon.
> 
> Not beta read, same as the previous chapter. Apologies for any errors but I'm serious when I say that the formatting here is enough to make me want to crawl into a hole and never come out again.

**Eddie:** I got your note. I'm sorry I didn't get to see you before you left. I didn't mean  
_Draft deleted, December 10 at 1:54 AM_  
  
  
**Eddie:** I know you think I'm being ridiculous, but I stand by my decision. If anything happened to you, or your career, because of me  
_Draft deleted, December 10 at 1:57 AM_  
  
  
**Eddie:** Can't sleep without you sawing logs like you're angling to take the gold at the Lumberjack Championship. Funny, ain't it?  
_Draft deleted, December 10 at 2:16 AM_

> **[OUTGOING CALL: MARY JONES]**  
>  December 10, 2019 at 2:28 AM
> 
> "Eddie? 'S two o'clock in the g'damn morning."
> 
> "I know. I know, I'm sorry for waking you, I just. Needed to talk to someone."
> 
> "Talk to Andy. N't that half the point of having him?"
> 
> "Andy ain't here."
> 
> "What? Why? Where is he?"
> 
> "I, uh..."
> 
> "Spit it out, Eds. You and your absentee boyfriend are shaving precious minutes off my beauty sleep. And you make sure he knows he owes me one for doing the late-night legwork with his emotionally stunted - "
> 
> "Mary, I told him to leave."
> 
> "What? Why - why would you do that?"
> 
> "C'mon, Mary. Look at the mess I'm in, here. The hell kind of a man would I be if I didn't try to keep him clear of the blast radius?"
> 
> "I'm gonna do you the favor of ignoring that melodrama 'cause I know you ain't slept in awhile, but Eddie. What were you thinking?"
> 
> "I was thinking that it's bad enough my whole career is suddenly circling the shitter. Ain't no reason Andy ought to risk his on account of my mistake."
> 
> "Your mistake? What, getting a little sloppy and sucking face with your boyfriend? Everybody does that sometimes."
> 
> "Everybody don't got thousands of strangers watching their every move, waiting for 'em to fuck up so they can boot 'em out of the only job they ever wanted, only job they ever loved without feeling guilty about cutting 'em loose."
> 
> "Fatalism ain't a good look on you, big brother."
> 
> "I know. I just - I know, Mary. I'm sorry."
> 
> "You want me to call someone for you?"
> 
> "Mar - "
> 
> "Not Andy, I know, but. One of the other boys could come sit with you, couldn't they? Burgin, maybe? He's a good kid."
> 
> "A good kid who don't need to get caught up in his captain's personal drama. Don't worry about me, Mary, I'm - I'm alright. I think I just need a little sleep."
> 
> "Shot of whiskey'll do you."
> 
> "Shot of whiskey's what kicked all this off in the first place."
> 
> "Well, good. That means one more can't hurt."
> 
> "I'll take it under advisement."
> 
> "Sleep well, Eds. And don't forget to call mama."
> 
> "Night, Mare."

**Nabhitha Khatri:** Good morning, Mr. Jones.  
  
I apologize for the hour, but I thought I would check in to see how you’re progressing with your statement before the day gets away from me. There’s still plenty of time to finish. The conference is scheduled at noon, so you don’t need to feel rushed, but if there’s anything I can do to help you with it in the meantime, let me know.  
_December 10 at 7:06 AM_  
  
**Edward Jones:** It's no trouble, Mrs. Khatri. Been up awhile, myself  
_December 10 at 7:09 AM_  
  
**Edward Jones:** I’ve got a draft done up but it ain’t much of anything  
_December 10 at 7:09 AM_  
  
**Nabhitha Khatri:** I’m sure it’s not all bad.  
_December 10 at 7:09 AM_  
  
**Nabhitha Khatri:** I could take a look at it if you’d like? Perhaps offer some feedback?  
_December 10 at 7:09 AM_  
  
**Edward Jones:** Yeah, that’d be great  
_December 10 at 7:11 AM_  
  
**Edward Jones:** Thank you  
_December 10 at 7:11 AM_  
  
**Nabhitha Khatri:** Happy to be of help.  
_December 10 at 7:11 AM_  
  
**Nabhitha Khatri:** You can send it to khatri@nolarougarouhockey.com  
_December 10 at 7:11 AM_  
  
**Nabhitha Khatri:** I’ll look it over right now so you don’t have to wait.  
_December 10 at 7:11 AM_  
  
**Edward Jones:** Thank you, ma’am  
_December 10 at 7:12 AM_  
  
**Nabhitha Khatri:** Anytime.  
_December 10 at 7:12 AM_  
  
**Nabhitha Khatri:** Like I said, I’m happy to help. It’s what I’m here for.  
_December 10 at 7:12 AM_  
  


**From:** Eddie Jones  
**To:** “Nabhitha Khatri” _(khatri@nolarougarouhockey.com)_  
Today at 7:14 AM  
  
Subject: Personal statement draft.  
Attachment: _statment.docx_  
  
Here you go. I know we talked about it during the meeting yesterday, but I’m not sure I did proper justice to all the pointers the media department had for me. Sorry if it’s lacking. It feels like my head ain’t been screwed on right since I woke up yesterday.  
  
Thank you again for all your help.  
  
-Eddie Jones

**From:** Nabhitha Khatri  
**To:** “Eddie Jones” _(countryjones33@gmail.com)_  
Today at 7:21 AM  
  
Subject: Re: Personal statement draft.  
Attachment: _statement-revised.docx_  
  
Eddie,  
  
I think you're off to a wonderful start. All your main points are there, with a great deal of your voice. I didn’t want to detract from any of that, so I kept my suggestions to a minimum. Give it a look over and if you like it, we can go ahead and prepare a release.  
  
Nabhitha Khatri  
Director of Public Relations  
New Orleans Rougarou Hockey Club  
_Bienvenue á la fais-do-Rou!_

**From:** Eddie Jones  
**To:** “Nabhitha Khatri” _(khatri@nolarougarouhockey.com)_  
Today at 7:27 AM  
  
Subject: Re: Re: Personal statement draft.  
  
Looks great. You really cleaned the sucker up.  
  
I hope you know it ain’t just empty flattery when I say I don’t know how to thank you enough for your help in all of this.  
  
-Eddie Jones

**From:** Nabhitha Khatri  
**To:** “Eddie Jones” _(countryjones33@gmail.com)_  
Today at 7:32 AM  
  
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Personal statement draft.  
  
I’ll remind you again that you don’t need to thank me at all, Mr. Jones. I signed on for this job because I love this team, and you are a significant part of what makes it special. It has been my privilege to guide you through this minefield so far, and it is my duty to see you safely to the other side.  
  
Before I forward this on to our media team, I feel I must ask one more time for certainty’s sake: are sure you don’t want to address the matter of your partner in the video? You are of course under no obligation to do so, but I’ll reiterate that should his identity come out, it would likely be to both your benefit that it be sooner, on your terms, rather than later, on someone else’s.  
  
Nabhitha Khatri  
Director of Public Relations  
New Orleans Rougarou Hockey Club  
_Bienvenue á la fais-do-Rou!_

**From:** Eddie Jones  
**To:** “Nabhitha Khatri” _(khatri@nolarougarouhockey.com)_  
Today at 7:34 AM  
  
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Personal statement draft.  
  
I understand why you feel the need to ask, but with all due respect to yourself and your team, Mrs. Khatri, I don’t want him anywhere near this.  
  
You have my permission to send the statement on as it stands.  
  
-Eddie Jones

**From:** Nabhitha Khatri  
**To:** “Eddie Jones” _(countryjones33@gmail.com)_  
Today at 7:37 AM  
  
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Personal statement draft.  
  
Very well, Mr. Jones. In that case, I shall send it on its way and our press kit will go out to all relevant media outlets as soon as it’s ready.  
  
I know it probably feels pretty harrowing from where you’re sitting right now, but keep in mind that per the media strategy we laid out, this conference will be the only press you do for the next few weeks so you’ll get a bit of a respite once it’s over.  
  
I’ll see you at 11. Wear something nice. If you need me before then, you know where to find me.  
  
Nabhitha Khatri  
Director of Public Relations  
New Orleans Rougarou Hockey Club  
_Bienvenue á la fais-do-Rou!_

**STEPPING OUT OF HIS COMFORT ZONE: EDWARD JONES RESPONDS TO VIRAL VIDEO**  
by Josh Elliott  
Yahoo! Sports - _December 10, 2019_  
  
Yesterday’s hottest scandal becomes the uplifting sports story of the hour when Edward Jones, captain of bayou bad boys, the New Orleans Rougarou, takes the stage to deliver a statement in response to the purported video of himself engaging romantically with another man that went viral on social media early Monday morning.  
  
With theories flying fast and loose from all angles, hockey fans the world over have been waiting with bated breath in anticipation of a response from the darling defenseman, who finally stepped up this afternoon with the full support of the New Orleans Rougarou organization behind him. Here’s what he had to say:  
  


> Good afternoon, everyone. Thank you all for coming.  
>    
>  Now, most of you already know me. For those of you who may not, allow me to introduce myself.  
>    
>  My name is Edward Jones, but most folks call me Hillbilly. I am a defenseman by trade, proud captain of the New Orleans Rougarou by some lucky turn of happenstance, and, as of this morning, the first professional player in the National Hockey League to come out as a gay man.  
>    
>  _[At this point the audience erupts in a volley of questions. Mr. Jones takes a moment to collect himself while a junior member of the New Orleans Rougarou’s PR team calls the room to order.]_  
>    
>  I understand that there are fans of this organization who see my standing up here today as an act of bravery, and that there are also fans who see my omission as a betrayal of their trust. To the former, I would like to offer an apology. It was never my intention to claim to be something I am not, and while I would like very much to take credit for my bravery in this matter, the truth is that, until yesterday morning, I had no intention of coming out to you all today, or tomorrow, or even ten years from now. If my hand had not been forced by circumstances outside of my control, I can’t rightly say that I ever would have. Not because I am ashamed of myself or of who I love, but because I don’t believe the gender of my romantic partners has ever had any bearing on my ability to play the game and play it well.  
>    
>  To the latter, to those fans who feel that I have deceived them in some way, I say respectfully that despite my unique position in the public eye, I do not owe an explanation of my character to anyone. What I _do_ owe to each and every one of you is my commitment to the leadership of this team, my drive to be the best player I can be, and my promise to do everything in my power to bring a Cup home to New Orleans before I hang up my skates. And I’ll tell you right now, I intend to follow through on all of it.  
>    
>  I thank you all for respecting my privacy in this matter going forward, and will not be taking questions at this time.

  
The Rougarou will be embarking on a four-game roadtrip, kicking off tomorrow in San Jose, with Jones charted to gear up and guide his team out onto the ice as usual. Only time will tell what kind of reception awaits.

**Kale Like the Salad** _@begaydorhymes_  
  
Welp. Looks like fanfiction was right.  
  
11:36 AM - 10 December 2019  
478 Retweets, 892 Likes

**Erika Kershaw** _@skatebabe92_  
  
This is a dark, dark day for puck bunnies everywhere. https://sports.yahoo.com/news/stepping-out-of-his-comfort-zone-edward-jones-responds-000337409.html  
  
12:25 PM - 10 December 2019 2.1K Retweets, 5.6K Likes

**Mary Jones:** Our boy looks good up there, don’t he?  
_December 10 at 12:06 PM_  
  
**Andrew Haldane:** He cuts a dashing figure.  
_December 10 at 12:06 PM_  
  
**Andrew Haldane:** Not sure I can lay much claim to him at the moment, though.  
_December 10 at 12:06 PM_  
  
**Mary Jones:** He told me what he did  
_December 10 at 12:07 PM_  
  
**Mary Jones:** Stubborn as a jackass and twice as stupid  
_December 10 at 12:07 PM_  
  
**Andrew Haldane:** He’s worried about me. My career. What’ll happen if word gets out.  
_December 10 at 12:09 PM_  
  
**Mary Jones:** I know  
_December 10 at 12:09 PM_  
  
**Mary Jones:** But the fact that I can understand his foolishness don’t mean I’ll be quick to forgive it  
_December 10 at 12:09 PM_  
  
**Mary Jones:** Tried to talk a little sense into him last night, but he wasn’t having it  
_December 10 at 12:10 PM_  
  
**Andrew Haldane:** I appreciate it, anyway.  
_December 10 at 12:10 PM_  
  
**Andrew Haldane:** I’m glad he reached out to you.  
_December 10 at 12:10 PM_  
  
**Andrew Haldane:** I was worried for a second that he might try to shoulder all of this alone.  
_December 10 at 12:10 PM_  
  
**Mary Jones:** He’s doing his damnedest, but all we Joneses got a gift for good old fashioned pig-headedness  
_December 10 at 12:14 PM_  
  
**Mary Jones:** I intend to put mine to good use, and I’m sure Mama’ll have a thing or two to say about it  
_December 10 at 12:14 PM_  
  
**Andrew Haldane:** Keep me posted. If there’s anything I can do to help you know I’ll be there in a heartbeat.  
_December 10 at 12:17 PM_  
  
**Mary Jones:** Best you can do for now is keep the faith, Skipper  
_December 10 at 12:19 PM_  
  
**Mary Jones:** My brother might be an idiot, but he loves you  
_December 10 at 12:19 PM_  
  
**Mary Jones:** He’ll get his head out of his ass one way or another, if I have to forcibly remove it myself  
_December 10 at 12:19 PM_  
  
**Andrew Haldane:** You’re good people, Mary Jones.  
_December 10 at 12:23 PM_  
  
**Mary Jones:** I’ll be sure to remind you of that next time I ask you to fix me up with one of your teammates  
_December 10 at 12:27 PM_

> **NHL APP SCORES**  
>  Wednesday, December 11
> 
>   
>  [FINAL]  
>  **JETS** \- **4 | OILERS - 2**  
>  25 SOG 38 SOG
> 
> [FINAL] **  
> SHARKS** \- **2 | ROUGAROU - 6**  
>  36 SOG 45 SOG
> 
> [FINAL] **  
> BLUES** \- **4 | DUCKS - 2**  
>  37 SOG 27 SOG
> 
> [FINAL/OT] **  
> RANGERS** \- **2 | AVALANCHE - 3**  
>  32 SOG 28 SOG  
> 
> 
> [FINAL] **  
> SENATORS** \- **2 | RED TAILS - 3**  
>  26 SOG 39 SOG 

**SLEDGE'S PREGAME Q &A AT ANA**  
DEC 13 2019 - 1:41  
https://www.nhl.com/rougarou/video/sledges-pregame-qa-at-ana/t-244937086  
  
**NHL:** Mike Schumacher here in sunny Anaheim, California with New Orleans Rougarou center Eugene Sledge. Eugene, talk to me a little bit about strategy here today. You guys have been playing it pretty sparse on defense down the push recently, with offense looking to be the main concern right now. What are some of the things you guys have talked about with the coaching staff in terms of improving scoring chances and getting after those goals?  
  
**SLEDGE:** Yeah. We just uh - gotta work on getting to the net, getting after those rebounds. We put up some great points the other night in San Jose, but y'know, there were a couple of times the rebound just wasn't with us, so we've got to just make sure we're there to catch the puck even when it doesn't want to go our way. We can get one, we can get two, and just, uh. Go from there, see where it takes us.  
  
**NHL:** Playing the Ducks tonight, one of the teams the Rougarou see on the ice a lot. What are some things that you're going to need to do in order to garner yourselves some, uh, some success here tonight?  
  
**SLEDGE:** Uh, yeah. The Ducks are, y'know, they're a great team, built for a playoff run. They've got a lot of veterans on their roster and when you're up against that kind of skill, you know. That kind of talent, you've got to, uh, just, keep it simple. These guys have spent a lot of time on the ice, and if you make a mistake, they know where to find it. You can't think you're just gonna dance around them, you've got to keep it simple, keep it deep. Do your best to play a tight game and just get those pucks to the net and keep them there.  
  
**NHL:** What about the mental component of the game here tonight? Your team has seen a lot of press lately, lot of external stress in the wake of your captain's announcement. How do you keep that out of your minds and focus on what you need to do here?  
  
**SLEDGE:** Yeah. Well, uh, you know, it's a, uh. It's a situation we're all dealing with, together, in a lot of ways. Hillbilly is - he's a fantastic captain, just, really a great guy to have with you on the ice and it's just - it's really unfair that he has to deal with this kind of thing, especially in this day and age, but he's been doing a great job of keeping it out of the locker room. At the end of the day, we've all got each other's backs and we've got his back on this and we know what we're all here for and that's to play a good game and that's what we aim to do.  
  
**NHL:** Thank you for taking a little time to talk with us, Eugene, and good luck out there tonight.  
  
**SLEDGE:** Yeah, thank you.

> **Google** Alerts  
>    
>  "NHL"  
>  Daily update - December 13, 2019  
>    
>  NEWS  
>    
>  \-----------------------------  
>    
>  In Depth: Burke joins Westhead and Masters to talk LGBTQ+ inclusivity  
>  _TSN_  
>  Given recent headlines, the fate and future of LGBTQ+ in the **NHL** is at the top of everyone's mind. This week on TSN In Depth, Patrick Burke of You Can Play joined Rick Westhead and Mark Masters to discuss.  
>  \-----------------------------  
>    
>  PHT Morning Skate: Eddie Jones is the first openly gay player in the **NHL** ; Edmonton pushing to be hub city  
>  _NBC Sports_  
>  Friday's collection of links.  
>  \-----------------------------  
>    
>  Ducks' right wing Leckie drops second sexuality bombshell on the **NHL** this week  
>  _Deadspin_  
>  In the immortal wisdom of Bob Dylan, "the times, they are a-changin'" and it's time for the **NHL** to catch up.

**mothman's spicy asshole** _@mothbutts_  
  
HO. LY. SHIT. HOLY. SHIT. HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT _@luckyleckie_ JUST LAID ONE ON _@buddybud17_ AT THE DUCKS GAME WHAT IS HAPPENING  
youtu.be/6MLApf2MlsA 0:35 9.7K views  
9:38 PM - 13 December 2019 8.1K Retweets, 12.2K Likes  
_@luckyleckie_ liked this

**Jefferson Fogerty** _@fogman96_  
  
_@AnaheimDucks @NOLARougarou_ It's official! _@Hillbilly33_ and _@luckyleckie_ say hockey is for the gays now! Everyone else off the ice!  
10:25 PM - 13 December 2019 1.4K Retweets, 3.6K Likes  
_@luckyleckie_ liked this

**Kelly Madripoor** _@madkelly_  
  
Okay but am I the only one who had to take a second for myself after seeing that kiss between _@luckyleckie_ & _@buddybud17_ ?  
12:25 AM - 14 December 2019 456 Retweets, 1.1K Likes  
_@luckyleckie_ liked this

**Unknown:** Hi Robert. This is Eddie Jones, from New Orleans. I got your number from my agent, Elmo Haney. I hope that’s alright. I just wanted to drop a line and thank you for what you did at the game the other day. It took bravery and resolve and not a little love to open yourself up like that—in front of a packed barn, to boot—and I find myself inspired and touched by turns. I know we don’t really know each other, but it means a lot to me to know there are other players in the League I can stand with in solidarity. Especially players as talented as yourself and Conley. I hope the hammer doesn’t come down too hard on either of you, and look forward to playing you again soon.  
  
Very sincerely,  
Eddie Jones  
_December 14 at 9:46 AM_  
  
**Robert Leckie:** Hey man, it’s great to hear from you!  
  
Believe me when I say that sucking face in the middle of the Honda Center was our genuine pleasure. Sorry to steal your thunder, but Runner and I have been talking about coming out for a long time and I’m far too vain not to make a spectacle when the opportunity arises.  
  
While your gratitude is noted and very much appreciated, it is likewise completely unnecessary. Runner and I both are of the opinion that the internet inflicted a grievous wrong upon you, taking the choice out of your hands the way it did, and I’m ashamed to call the uneducated half-wits in the stands the other night our fans. We weren’t about to let you stand out there and suffer the brunt of public ignorance alone.  
  
Us queers got to stick together, right? I bet there are more of us per capita than Bettman and all the media pundits would believe. Figure this is a solid first step toward our slow takeover of the League entire. At the very least, Walt Disney is turning over in his grave—an outcome to which we should all aspire more often.  
  
We’ll have to grab a drink or something next time you’re in town, commiserate about the toxic heteronormative culture in pro sports while Runner schools us both at shuffleboard. In the meantime, don’t be a stranger, alright? Nobody should go through this shit alone and, for better or worse, you’ve got us both in your corner.  
_December 14 at 9:51 AM_  
  
**Eddie Jones:** I might just take you up on that.  
_December 14 at 9:52 AM_  
  
**Robert Leckie:** Good. I promise it's worth it for the spectacle of watching Runner play shuffleboard, alone. The man is some kind of savant.  
_December 14 at 9:54 AM_  
  
**Robert Leckie:** Runner asked me to give you his info too, in case you decide to take us up on that evening out. Apparently I‘m unreliable when it comes to scheduling.  


> **Contact: Bud Conley**  
>  _DOWNLOAD INFORMATION >_

_  
December 14 at 9:59 AM   
_  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank y'all so much for reading~


	3. Chapter 3

_www.nytimes.com_  
OPINION | **IS THE FUTURE OF SPORTS REALLY OVER THE RAINBOW?**  
Jonathon Beall - December 14, 2019  
  
With three NHLers coming out over the last week, I think it's safe to say that the conversation around gay athletes in ice hockey is reaching a fever pitch. We've seen [a couple of gay players in North American juniors,](https://www.outsports.com/2020/4/21/21224462/college-hockey-brock-weston-gay-coming-out) and a [former forward from the Finnish Liiga came out publicly in October](https://www.outsports.com/2019/10/29/20937333/hockey-finland-janne-puhakka-gay-pro-sports-player-coming-out), all touting the idea that honesty builds better team chemistry. Heartwarming as that theory may be, I feel obligated to remind my fellow hockey fans that, as accomplished as these players are, they all have one trait in common aside from their sexuality—they aren't playing in The Show.  
  
While New Orleans Rougarou management and coaching staff were swift to throw their support behind captain and defenseman Edward Jones, and Hugh Corrigan, captain of the Anaheim Ducks, likewise professed his approval of winger Robert Leckie's relationship with fellow teammate Bud Conley in a post-game interview (despite a little brotherly irritation with the irreverent method by which Leckie announced his sexuality), the NHL organization has been conspicuously silent on the topic so far. Considering that the industry is pushing the five-billion dollar mark, it's no great surprise that the men in charge might want to let the chips settle some before they throw their weight in one direction or another and risk alienating part of their consumer base, but even that silence is speaking. What it says to this sports is reporter is that you can't force progress on an institution that isn't ready.  
  
Hockey, more than the other three major North American sports leagues, relies on the team mentality for success. Baseball, football, and basketball have all fallen victim to the dangers of celebrity to varying degrees over decades past, with teams pinning their hopes—and the cap space in their salary budget—on an individual player to excel and see them through to a championship win. It's a strategy that has even paid off, at times, but if there's one truth of the game that hockey has taught us over and over again, it's that star power doesn't get you very far on regulation ice. Fastening your success to a single individual is a methodology that simply doesn't suit the sport. If it did, Connor McDavid could have towed the Edmonton Oilers into back-to-back Stanley Cup wins over the last three seasons. All of which to say that, while honesty is important in the locker room, any time a players' individual identity overshadows the health of the team as a whole it's at the risk of damaging on-ice performance. By identifying themselves as gay men, Jones et. al. have very clearly delineated an "us" and a "them" in an arena that should be the sole provenance of "we."  
  
The most frustrating part of watching this saga unfold from a fan perspective is the lack of decisive action on the part of the greater NHL overseers. This is far from the first time that a players' reputation has made him a liability to the team, the only difference is that everyone is walking on eggshells for fear of misstepping in the minefield of political correctness. It's the League's responsibility to prioritize the success of the sport over all else, and I, for one, no longer trust in their willingness to make the difficult decision and trim the fat off the cultural conversation, so I'll say it for them:  
  
With all due respect to the gay players out there, swallow your pride for the good of the team and keep it off the ice.

> COMMENTS  
>  **Missa Fawkes** says:  
>  "Glad to see homophobia is alive and well in the year of our Lord 2019."  
>    
>    
>  **Kelly Marie Quinn** says:  
>  "Nooooo they're all so hot! What a waste. Why can't the ugly players be gay?"  
>    
>    
>  **Dan Creedy** says:  
>  "It's not homophobia, it's just the truth. Straight men aren't comfortable sharing the intimacy of the locker room with gays and it's not fair of these guys to put their teammates in that position. They're being selfish and they ought to be traded out of the game, or at least benched for the season."

**Ryan Coolidge** _@cooligan_  
  
_@bigbeallsie_ spitting mad truths today. https://www.nytimes.com/2019/12/14/opinion/nhl-over-the-rainbow.html  
  
4:54 PM - 14 December 2019  
856 Retweets, 1K Likes

**Beckham Brigham** _@beckhabrigs_  
  
_@cooligan_ _@bigbeallsie_ 1950 called. It wants its hot takes back.  
  
5:12 PM - 14 December 2019  
856 Retweets, 1K Likes

r/NHL  
  
Posted by u/randyjailhouse 5 hours ago  
**893 | Should Leckie and Conley be allowed to play together?**  
  
Not to be homophobic, but I just can't see how it's a good idea to leave the guys on the same line. What happens if one of them doesn't do the dishes fast enough and the other one decides to be a bitch about it? I don't want to lose points just because a couple dudes decided crossing swords was more important than getting after Lord Stanley.  
_92% Upvoted_

> **badfork** 43 points - 5 hours ago  
>  Fuck the same line, they shouldn't even be playing for the same team. I say boot Leckie. He's solid on the breakaway but it's not worth a couple goals a season to have to put up with his massive fucking ego. None of this would have happened if he didn't decide to put himself before the team after all the Jones bullshit on the Rougarou. Conley can stay, as long as he promises to dip his dick outside the company ink from now on.  
>    
>  **puckaduck** 12 points - 3 hours ago - _edited 3 hours ago_  
>  They never should have said anything in the first place. It sucks that Jones got outed but that was his own damn fault. Don't need this gay shit dragging the Ducks down too.  
>    
>  **wootseternal** 88 points - 1 hour ago  
>  I'm with badfork - lose Leckie, keep Conley. His stats are better, anyway.  
>    
>  Gotta hope someone is doing some serious reconnaissance on Jones in all this, too. If he's boinking a teammate I think the same standard should apply.

**  
VIEW ENTIRE DISCUSSION (1.3K COMMENTS)  
**

**Snafu:** https://t.co/G34s8PmA2f  
_December 15 at 11:53 PM_  
  
**Snafu:** whens the wedding sledgehammer?  
_December 15 at 11:53 PM_  
  
**Sledge:** Oh Lord  
_December 15 at 11:53 PM_  
  
**Sledge:** You know you’re the eighth person who’s sent me this?  
_December 15 at 11:53 PM_  
  
**Snafu:** u make a handsome couple  
_December 15 at 11:54 PM_  
  
**Sledge:** Including my parents  
_December 15 at 11:54 PM_  
  
**Snafu:** howd they take it  
_December 15 at 11:54 PM_  
  
**Sledge:** Oh they were delighted I’d thrown my lot in with such a fine young man  
_December 15 at 11:55 PM_  
  
**Sledge:** I think my mother was honestly disappointed when I told her that Hillbilly I aren’t a couple  
_December 15 at 11:55 PM_  
  
**Snafu:** mama sledge got good taste  
_December 15 at 11:57 PM_  
  
**Sledge:** It’s been two weeks already  
_December 15 at 11:58 PM_  
  
**Sledge:** Shouldn’t everyone be over all this by now?  
_December 15 at 11:58 PM_  
  
**Snafu:** plz this is the biggest news gonna hit the league all year  
_December 15 at 11:59 PM_  
  
**Sledge:** Well then, they can at least leave me out of it  
_December 16 at 12:00 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** dont get all bent up about it, sledgehammer  
_December 16 at 12:00 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** they runnin thru every guy hillbilly ever looked at tryn 2 find his secret lover  
_December 16 at 12:00 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Yeah  
_December 16 at 12:00 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Cold comfort to the guy currently topping the list  
_December 16 at 12:00 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Don't even know how I MADE the list  
_December 16 at 12:01 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** its cuz ur fussy  
_December 16 at 12:01 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Fuck you  
_December 16 at 12:01 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** i like fussy  
_December 16 at 12:01 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** So does the internet, apparently  
_December 16 at 12:01 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** thats cuz they kno  
_December 16 at 12:02 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** fussys the most fun 2 mess up  
_December 16 at 12:02 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Like you would know  
_December 16 at 12:02 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** You get slapped by lots of fussy girls but never seem to get any of them home  
_December 16 at 12:02 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** thats only 1 kinda messin  
_December 16 at 12:02 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** watch my game tape sometime sledgehammer  
_December 16 at 12:03 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** built my career on messin shit up  
_December 16 at 12:03 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Believe me I have  
_December 16 at 12:03 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** then u kno im an expert & my studied opinion is ur bout as fussy as they come  
_December 16 at 12:03 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** I will allow that I might be a little particular, but fussy seems excessive  
_December 16 at 12:03 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** tell that 2 ur stick tape  
_December 16 at 12:03 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Stick tape is important! You have to wrap it just right or your whole game is off  
_December 16 at 12:04 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** see? fussy  
_December 16 at 12:04 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** I know I’m not the only one who feels that way about stick tape  
_December 16 at 12:04 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** only 1 ive seen do it over 6 times in a row  
_December 16 at 12:04M_  
  
**Snafu:** thats y they like u 4 hillbilly’s sordid love affair  
_December 16 at 12:04 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** plus u got that mouth  
_December 16 at 12:05 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** What’s wrong with my mouth???  
_December 16 at 12:05 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** nothin  
_December 16 at 12:05 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** its nice  
_December 16 at 12:05 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** but a fussy boy w a pretty mouth makes 4 a quality twink  
_December 16 at 12:05 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** I was under the impression that 'professional athlete' and 'twink' were mutually exclusive states of being  
_December 16 at 12:07 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** tyler seguin begs to disagree  
_December 16 at 12:07 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** There is no way I’m as much of a twink as Tyler Seguin  
_December 16 at 12:07 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** dont sell urself short sledgehammer  
_December 16 at 12:07 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Asshole  
_December 16 at 12:08 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** if it bothers u so much go get a haircut  
_December 16 at 12:08 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** So now it’s my hair that makes me a twink?  
_December 16 at 12:08 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Two seconds ago you blamed it on my mouth  
_December 16 at 12:08 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** ur mouth is the biggest flag but that choirboy combover aint helpin  
_December 16 at 12:09 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Your advice has been duly noted and disregarded as absolute horseshit  
_December 16 at 12:09 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Does Hillbilly even have a boyfriend?  
_December 16 at 12:09 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** He never said  
_December 16 at 12:09 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** aint said much a anything since the video  
_December 16 at 12:10 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Can’t imagine why  
_December 16 at 12:10 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** least we got u 2 eat up all his press minutes  
_December 16 at 12:11 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** media loves that genteel southern debutante bullshit  
_December 16 at 12:11 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Yeah, lucky me  
_December 16 at 12:11 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** I’m kinda worried about him. Aren’t you?  
_December 16 at 12:13 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** course i am  
_December 16 at 12:13 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** aint nothin 2 help it but time  
_December 16 at 12:13 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** I thought about saying something to Coach about it, but I know it‘s not really my place  
_December 16 at 12:13 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** LOL  
_December 16 at 12:13 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** yah, dont say nothin 2 coach  
_December 16 at 12:13 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** You don’t think the Skipper has a problem do you?  
_December 16 at 12:14 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Maybe that’s why Hillbilly’s being so weird. The two of them have been kinda careful around each other recently.  
_December 16 at 12:14 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** only problem coach has is a martyr complex  
_December 16 at 12:14 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** cant throw himself on the pyre this time tho  
_December 16 at 12:14 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** You think he would?  
_December 16 at 12:14 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** 4 any of us, sure, probly  
_December 16 at 12:14 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** 4 hillbilly no question  
_December 16 at 12:15 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Does Hillbilly know that?  
_December 16 at 12:15 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** maybe  
_December 16 at 12:15 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** if he dont, cant nobody tell him til he decides he wants 2 know  
_December 16 at 12:15 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** Well what are we supposed to do, then?  
_December 16 at 12:15 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** play  
_December 16 at 12:15 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** win  
_December 16 at 12:15 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** hold the line til hillbilly got his head back where it belongs  
_December 16 at 12:15 AM_  
  
**Sledgehammer:** You think we can do that?  
_December 16 at 12:16 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** sure  
_December 16 at 12:16 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** just got this pretty lil thing from auburn added to our roster  
_December 16 at 12:16 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** fast as hell with some damn soft hands, even if he is a lil fussy 4 my taste  
_December 16 at 12:16 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** You’re such an asshole  
_December 16 at 12:16 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** ain’t gon keep hillbilly round 4 long with that attitude  
_December 16 at 12:17 AM_  
  
**Sledge:** 🖕  
_December 16 at 12:17 AM_  
  
**Snafu:** 😘  
_December 16 at 12:17 AM_  


**Burgie:** Hey cap. How's tricks?  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Fine  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Bout the same as they have been  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Everything alright?  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Burgie:** Yeah, I'm good. Just wanted to check in. I know you've got a lot on your plate right now but I'm here to help if you need it.  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Well that's awful kind of you, Burgie  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** I'm holding up okay  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Things are the way they are at the moment. No use borrowin trouble  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Burgie:** Yeah.  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Burgie:** Sledge said you apologized to him for that spec piece.  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Seemed the least I could do, considering  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** He okay?  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Burgie:** Yeah, fine. A little confused, maybe, but he wasn't bothered none.  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Burgie:** Said his mama was heartbroken when she learned it wasn't the real deal.  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM  
EDWARD laughed at this message._  
  
**Edward:** That's sweet of her  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Burgie:** You know if you WERE dating someone you could tell us, right?  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Burgie:** No pressure, or anything, but the guys wouldn't care. I'd make sure of it.  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Nothin to tell  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Thank you, though  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Edward:** I appreciate the offer  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Burgie:** Alright.  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_  
  
**Burgie:** You ever change your mind, you know you got your A in your corner.  
_December 16 at 1:17 PM_

> **[MISSED CALL: ANDREW HALDANE]**  
>  _December 17, 2019 at 9:55 PM_  
>    
>  Hi. I - uh. Just wanted to check in. I know you don’t - I know you wanted some time, and I’m not trying to push. Just, haven’t heard from you. Not that I was expecting to, but some of the boys, you know, they were asking after you. I told them to let you be, but if you need anything, you - uh. You know where I am. Alright. I - [sigh] I hope this finds you well. Bye.

**Mama:** Hi sweetheart. What time are you and Andy getting in for Christmas? I know you told me but I didn't write it down and now it's slipped right out of my head.  
_December 19 at 10:36 AM_  
  
**Edward:** My flight comes in at 7 AM on the 23rd  
_December 19 at 10:38 AM_  
  
**Edward:** Don't expect Andy'll be on it  
_December 19 at 10:38 AM_  
  
**Mama:** Edward Allison Jones.  
_December 19 at 10:39 AM_  
  
**Mama:** Don't tell me you're still giving that poor boy the runaround.  
_December 19 at 10:39 AM_  
  
**Edward:** It ain't like that  
_December 19 at 10:39 AM_  
  
**Edward:** I'm trying to do the right thing  
_December 19 at 10:39 AM_  
  
**Mama:** Can't well see how leaving Andy alone on Christmas is the right thing.  
_December 19 at 10:39 AM_  
  
**Edward:** He won't be alone  
_December 19 at 10:40 AM_  
  
**Edward:** Lots of guys stay in town for the holidays  
_December 19 at 10:40 AM_  
  
**Mama:** You know what I mean.  
_December 19 at 10:41 AM_  
  
**Mama:** Lovely as your teammates are, that ain't the same as being around family.  
_December 19 at 10:41 AM_  
  
**Mama:** Andrew's been with us every Christmas for the last three years. Things won't feel right without him.  
_December 19 at 10:41 AM_  
  
**Edward:** I can't make him come  
_December 19 at 10:41 AM_  
  
**Mama:** No, but you could let him know you want him there.  
_December 19 at 10:43 AM_  
  
**Edward:** Doesn't matter what I want  
_December 19 at 10:45 AM_  
  
**Edward:** How easy do you think it's gonna be for someone to catch us at the airport together and connect the dots?  
_December 19 at 10:45 AM_  
  
**Edward:** I can't ask him to do that  
_December 19 at 10:45 AM_  
  
**Mama:** Seems like the kind of risk Andy ought to be able to decide for himself if he's willing to take.  
_December 19 at 10:45 AM_  
  
**Edward:** I already know he would  
_December 19 at 10:46 AM_  
  
**Edward:** That ain't the point  
_December 19 at 10:46 AM_  
  
**Mama:** Why don't you enlighten me?  
_December 19 at 10:46 AM_  
  
**Edward:** You know his parents as good as cut him out when he told them we were together  
_December 19 at 10:47 AM_  
  
**Edward:** I can't let the NHL turn its back on him, too  
_December 19 at 10:47 AM_  
  
**Mama:** And who says they would?  
_December 19 at 10:48 AM_  
  
**Edward:** Mama please  
_December 19 at 10:49 AM_  
  
**Edward:** You've seen the kinds of things folks're saying online  
_December 19 at 10:49 AM_  
  
**Mama:** That's nothing but a bunch of loudmouthed strangers.  
_December 19 at 10:50 AM_  
  
**Mama:** What about your manager? Your team?  
_December 19 at 10:50 AM_  
  
**Mama:** Nobody's turned those nice boys in Anaheim out into the cold just yet.  
_December 19 at 10:50 AM_  
  
**Mama:** Just think about it, alright?  
_December 19 at 11:02 AM_  
  
**Edward:** No promises  
_December 19 at 11:03 AM_  
  


**From:** Deon Langley  
**CC:** "Nabhitha Khatri" _(khatri@nolarougarouhockey.com_ ); "Cheryl Wambauch" _(wambauc@nolarougarouhockey.com)_  
**To:** “Eddie Jones” _(countryjones33@gmail.com)_  
Today at 1:21 PM  
  
**Subject:** Pride Jersey  
**Attachment:** Number33_Pride.png  
  
Mr. Jones,  
  
It is my great pleasure to inform you that our collection of NOLA Rougarou branded pride gear has seen a 112% increase in purchase since your announcement the other day. I understand that circumstances weren't ideal, but thought it might serve as a silver lining to know that as a result of your bravery, fans of the Rougarou are coming out in force to show their pride in the stands, too.  
  
In light of this development, one of our designers—herself a member of the LGBTQ community, who I've CC'ed here—had the idea to draw up a specialty pride jersey with your number on the back. With your permission, we'd like to offer it as a specialty item, with all the proceeds going to You Can Play, or a charity of your choice that supports LGBTQ athletes.  
  
I've attached a mock-up of the jersey so you can see what it would look like. Let us know what you think!  
  
  
Deon Langley  
Director of Merchandise Development  
New Orleans Rougarou Hockey Club

**From:** Eddie Jones  
**To:** “Deon Langley” _(langle7@nolarougarouhockey.com)_  
**CC:** "Nabhitha Khatri" _(khatri@nolarougarouhockey.com)_ ; "Cheryl Wambauch" (wambauc@nolarougarouhockey.com)  
Today at 1:26 PM  
  
**Subject:** Re: Pride Jersey  
  
Mr. Langley,  
  
Let me first say that I'm thoroughly flattered, both by the support of the Rougarou fan base and your own kind sentiments. Likewise, I wanted to make sure to note that I think Cheryl did a tremendous job on the jersey design. It looks great. If it's all the same to you, I'd like to take a few days to think on your proposition.  
  
The mishandling of my personal business has already created some friction for my team, and I don't want to make any other moves that might affect the mood in the locker room without due consideration.  
  
  
Kind regards,  
Eddie Jones

**From:** Deon Langley  
**CC:** "Nabhitha Khatri" _(khatri@nolarougarouhockey.com)_ ; "Cheryl Wambauch" _(wambauc@nolarougarouhockey.com)_  
**To:** “Eddie Jones” _(countryjones33@gmail.com)_  
Today at 1:21 PM  
  
**Subject:** Re: Re: Pride Jersey  
  
Absolutely, Mr. Jones. Take all the time you need.  
  
  
Deon Langley  
Director of Merchandise Development  
New Orleans Rougarou Hockey Club

**Edward:** Tell me I'm not makin a mistake  
_December 19 at 11:24 PM_  
  
**Gunny:** Gonna have to be more specific there, kid.  
_December 19 at 11:27 PM_  
  
**Gunny:** If you're talking about coming out, it's a little late to worry.  
_December 19 at 11:27 PM_  
  
**Gunny:** No putting that cat back in the bag no matter how tight a knot you got your knickers in about it.  
_December 19 at 11:27 PM_  
  
**Edward:** I know  
_December 19 at 11:27 PM_  
  
**Edward:** I know that  
_December 19 at 11:28 PM_  
  
**Edward:** I mean with Andy  
_December 19 at 11:28 PM_  
  
**Gunny:** Fuckin Christ.  
_December 19 at 11:28 PM_  
  
**Gunny:** Think real hard about what you want to say to me right now, kid. We got agent-client privilege between us but any dumbshit gets his hands on your phone code can read a text.  
_December 19 at 11:28 PM_  
  
**Edward:** You're right  
_December 19 at 11:29 PM_  
  
**Edward:** I know your right  
_December 19 at 11:29 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Can't help wondering tho  
_December 19 at 11:29 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Leckie and his guy make it work  
_December 19 at 11:34 PM_  
  
**Gunny:** Goddamit kid. I ain't your fairy godmother.  
_December 19 at 11:35 PM_  
  
**Gunny:** If you and the Skipper want to come clean, come clean. If you don't, don't.  
_December 19 at 11:35 PM_  
  
**Gunny:** We can make it happen either way. Your team has contingencies we can exploit if you want to take the honest route.  
_December 19 at 11:35 PM_  
  
**Gunny:** Just be prepared to weather whatever comes at you after the fact.  
_December 19 at 11:36 PM_  
  
**Edward:** I don't know  
_December 19 at 11:37 PM_  
  
**Edward:** What if we can't survive that?  
_December 19 at 11:37 PM_  
  
**Edward:** What if it ruins everything?  
_December 19 at 11:37 PM_  
  
**Gunny:** Real happiness comes with a risk.  
_December 19 at 11:37 PM_  
  
**Gunny:** Up to you to decide how brave you want to be. Take a few days, think it through, talk to the Skipper.  
_December 19 at 11:38 PM_  
  
**Gunny:** And for the love of God take some aspirin and drink some water before you crawl your way into bed tonight.  
_December 19 at 11:38 PM_  
  
**Gunny:** The hangover waiting for you on the other side of this is not going to be kind.  
_December 19 at 11:38 PM_  
  


**Edward:** Andy,  
I know I've been a shit about things, but  
_Draft deleted, December 22 at 5:34 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Andy,  
I made a mistake when I asked you to put some distance between us. I hope  
_Draft deleted, December 22 at 5:37 PM_  
  
**Edward:** Can we talk?  
_December 22 at 5:41 PM_  
  
  
  


> **[INCOMING CALL: ANDREW HALDANE]**  
>  December 22, 2019 at 5:42 PM

**From:** Eddie Jones  
**To:** “Deon Langley” _(langle7@nolarougarouhockey.com)_  
**CC:** "Nabhitha Khatri" _(khatri@nolarougarouhockey.com)_ ; "Cheryl Wambauch" _(wambauc@nolarougarouhockey.com)_  
Today at 9:41 PM  
  
**Subject:** Re: Pride Jersey  
  
Mr. Langley,  
  
Apologies for the delay. After much consideration and discussion with several individuals much smarter than myself, I would like to extend my official endorsement of the #33 pride jersey. Let's do it.  
  
My gratitude again to Ms. Wambauch for her outstanding creativity.  
  
\- Eddie


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And lo, it is finally finished! I hope it was worth the wait. Obviously the contents herein are predicated on the idea that current events aren't happening as they are in real life. Just roll with it.
> 
> Thank you all for sticking with me through this thing, and enjoy!

_https://www.si.com/nhl_  
  
**FLOAT ON: A PERSONAL RETROSPECTIVE WITH EDDIE JONES**  
Annabelle Zhou for Sports Illustrated  
July 2020  
  
Eddie Jones has had one hell of a year. Outed by a fan video the night he helped the New Orleans Rougarou clinch a playoff spot for the first time in franchise history, Jones became the first openly gay player in the NHL entirely without his consent and then turned right around to lead his team all the way to Game 7 in pursuit of the Stanley Cup.  
  
Though Lord Stanley’s esteemed hardware went home with the Tampa Bay Lightning after center Nikita Kucherov scored a lucky—and hotly contested—golden goal, Jones landed himself an admirable consolation prize. He brought the Lady Byng Memorial Trophy back to the bayou with him and settled into a rustic brick bungalow with his partner of five years, who has been the subject of much rumor and speculation since the video that turned Jones into the poster boy for queer inclusivity in the NHL first aired in December of last year.  
  
The real kicker, I discover when I arrive on Jones’s doorstep, recording equipment in tow, is that Jones’s much-mythologized partner is an already familiar face throughout the hockey community. Andrew ‘Ack Ack’ Haldane—who stepped up to coach the New Orleans Rougarou after two years struggling to get a handle on the severe post-concussion syndrome that ended his playing career—answers the door, introduces himself, and apologizes for the oversized pickup taking up the driveway. He explains that he and Jones spent the previous afternoon drifting around Lake Pontchartrain and confesses that his intentions of unloading their fishing gear and moving the truck into the garage that morning had fallen by the wayside in favor of having a lie-in.  
  
Haldane beckons me inside and excuses himself to fetch a few cups of coffee, though not before ducking in to drop a familiar kiss to Jones’s cheek. I look to Jones, whose boy-next-door charm is well-served by the pink flush that Haldane’s candor has left in his face, and ask him the obvious question: how did it all start?  
  
Jones rolls his eyes at Haldane’s back, and while he guides me into the living room, he gives me the Cliff’s Notes version:  
  
Though they would go on to play together in the pros, Jones first crossed paths with his beaux during their tenure in the junior league, when the Odessa Jackalopes clashed on the ice against the Corpus Christi IceRays—then captained by one Andrew Haldane, also skating defense. Seated in the quaint living room of Jones and Haldane’s Lakeview bungalow, which boasts two bookshelves replete with hardware and a couple of framed jerseys from various teams Jones and Haldane have played with over the years, I ask Jones—poised comfortably on the sofa with one dog in his lap and another sprawled out beside him—if it was love at first check. He looks up from rubbing their ears just long enough to laugh at me.  
  
“No,” he tells me. “It was nothing like that. Andy was a hell of a player and I admired him a great deal, still do, but I didn’t figure I was interested in him until later. Much later.”  
  
I ask how their romance came about and Jones twists his mouth up, shaking his head and darting a glance to where Haldane is knocking around in the kitchen, humming to himself. “You’re going to laugh at this,” Jones warns me. “Andy actually made the first move.”  
  
The story he weaves isn’t all that dissimilar to the relationship any up-and-coming professional athlete might have, wherein a longtime friendship suddenly pivots into something more. By his own account, Jones was playing with the Wild while Andy was on the roster in Columbus. They’d been friends for years but had recently fallen into the habit of talking on the phone and video chatting more regularly than usual. Certainly more regularly than any of their peers.  
  
“Probably should have been my first clue,” Jones observes, with a wry grin. He shrugs. “That’s hindsight for you, I guess.”  
  
It was tradition for Jones and Haldane to meet up whenever the road schedule allowed, so on the last leg of a minor Metropolitan tour Jones found himself in Columbus for the evening, dinner plans with Haldane already on the calendar. The restaurant, Jones admits, was nicer than the places he and Haldane usually attended, though he didn’t think anything of it until about halfway through the meal, when Haldane laid his fork down and took Jones’s hand across the table.  
  
His big pitch, according to Jones, was: “Stop me if I’m out of line here, but I’d really like to try this with you.”  
  
Jones screws his face up and shakes his head, looking sheepish. “It don’t sound real exciting when I say it like that, but I’m telling you, it was something special,” he insists. “One of the best days of my life.”  
  
I ask if it was better than the day he got drafted, and Jones laughs.  
  
“I think Andy would forgive me for putting the two at a solid tie.”  
  
Haldane confirms this himself when he takes a seat on the sofa beside Jones, depositing our beverages on the table between us.  
  
“Honestly, I think that’s a more gracious placement than I deserve,” he admits, slipping an arm around Jones’s shoulders. “I have it in me to be much more suave than that, but one look at Eddie sitting across from me at the table and my mind completely short-circuited.” He widens his eyes and makes a sound like a sparking socket and Jones reaches over to cuff him affectionately on the shoulder.  
  
“Don’t embarrass us in front of the associated press,” he chides, and Haldane grins at him, unabashed.  
  
After a few moments of good-natured ribbing, I finally get around to asking Jones and Haldane why they waited until now to reveal the nature of their relationship. They’ve been together for nearly half a decade and functionally living together for more than a year. Why not bring it up when the discussion about Jones’s sexuality entered the public forum, kill two birds with one stone?  
  
“Well,” Jones says, looking embarrassed while Haldane rubs his shoulder, “that was mostly my fault. I was...surprised, to say the very least, when that video came out, and I regret to say that I didn’t handle everything with as much grace as I might have liked.”  
  
The story emerges in bits and pieces: Haldane was there with Jones the morning he got the call. Jones’s phone had died the night before, so when the Rougarou’s public relations department couldn’t get in touch with Jones directly, general manager “Chesty” Puller figured that Haldane might know where to find him.  
  
“I don’t suspect he imagined it was as easy as rolling over in bed,” Haldane quips. Jones swats at him again and admonishes him to behave. Haldane catches his hand and holds it, looking uncharacteristically somber as he continues, “The way Chesty sounded, I thought someone had died.” I ask if it was a relief to learn the truth and Jones considers for a long moment.  
  
“Yes and no,” he hedges. While Jones was glad that the only injury had ultimately been to his dignity, he was fully unprepared for what the video meant. “I don’t think I really grasped the seriousness of the situation until we got to the office,” he tells me. “I remember we had to drive ‘round back because there were all these reporters staked out at the front entrance, hoping for some kind of inside scoop. That was the first time I remember feeling like, ‘Oh, no, this is really bad.’”  
  
Jones met with management the morning after the video aired, with Haldane in tow, though he dismissed him after the initial session of strategy planning.  
  
“Andy offered to come out with me,” Jones explains. “I turned him down. Told him to go on home. Figured it’d be best if we didn’t talk for a while, didn’t see each other.” He laughs, not altogether amused, and shakes his head. “Some fool I was.”  
  
If Haldane was bothered by this attempted dissolution of a relationship spanning nearly five years, he doesn’t let it show, just maintains his grip on Jones’s hand and gazes over at him in besotted reverence, letting Jones work through his next statements.  
  
It was a painful process, Jones admits. He’s a fairly private person, despite the celebrity expected—nay required—of any athlete participating in an elite sports league, and coming out had never factored into his long-term goals. Despite the support of his family, his team, and later, the League itself, Jones confesses that the negative feedback his announcement garnered was often the loudest and most prevalent in his mind.  
  
“It becomes a habit to wake up wondering who hates you today,” Jones says, and the pain is evident in his tone and his posture. “Like it’s just a given that another fan is going to morally denounce you on Twitter, or some wannabe shock-jockey on a podcast is going to judge your entire career up against this one character facet and find in favor of firebombing the whole damn thing.”  
  
Haldane leans in to kiss his hair and Jones flashes him a subdued smile.  
  
The positive voices were out there, though, Jones is quick to express. Even if it took him a little while to hear them over the immediate backlash.  
  
I ask Jones whose voice was most influential in turning the tide for him, personally, and he apportions the honor amongst a few individuals.  
  
“My sister, Mary,” Jones says, first off. “My whole family, really, but Mary was the only one who wasn’t afraid to get in my face about it right from the outset. She was _not_ happy about the way I treated Andy and she let me know it.”  
  
Haldane snorts at this and says to Jones, “You know she offered to buy me a ticket out for Christmas if you didn’t pull your head out of your ass before the holidays?” He looks over to me and clarifies, “Her words.”  
  
It’s Jones’s turn to laugh, this time. “Yeah,” he agrees, with the particular cadence of long-suffering sigh known only to those who have experienced the direct interference of an overbearing sibling more than once in their life. “That sounds like Mary.”  
  
Jones also commends his agent and many of his fellow NHLers for helping him to overcome the immediate deluge of depression and anxiety that the outing forced him into. R.V. Burgin, the alternate captain of the New Orleans Rougarou, and most of Jones’s other teammates reached out to him privately after the news aired to make sure that he knew he had their support, while Robert Leckie, who entered into free agency at the end of the season alongside long-term partner and fellow winger Bud Conley, took a more public approach to expressing his solidarity.  
  
“Oh, Lord,” Jones says, rolling his eyes when I ask him about the infamous kiss at center ice. “I didn’t even _know_ Bob when he did that. ‘Bout fell over on my skates right there, I’ll tell you.”  
  
Fast friends in the aftermath of the aforementioned theatrics, Jones credits the opportunity to share his experiences with someone who had gone through similar things with helping develop his ability to cope. It didn’t just stop at Leckie, either. Other players began reaching out to him, too, from juniors and overseas leagues to celebrated NHL players, both retired and those still active on the ice. While Jones expertly avoids referencing specific individuals, it’s clear that the NHL is in possession of a prouder history than most people know, and Jones is none too smug about it even if it is a secret.  
  
I ask him if he expects any of his fellow queer players to come out anytime soon and Jones shakes his head.  
  
“I don’t know,” he says. “It’s hard, you know? Everybody likes to talk about how we’ve paved the way, or what have you, but it’s easy to forget that it takes more than one stone to build a road. Lying down to let folk walk all over you ain’t easy, even if it is for the greater good in the long run.”  
  
This interview, he explains, is his and Haldane’s attempt to push the League and the sport of hockey as a whole another few inches in the right direction. Haldane’s name carries a lot of weight in the hockey industry, and adding it to the sparse roster of queer players helps to expand the public perception of what a queer player can be. I ask if it’s any easier, now that the couple has one successful coming out under their belts.  
  
“It’s nice to be able to do it on our terms, this time,” Haldane says. “People might be surprised, but there’s truth to the old adage about strength in numbers.”  
  
“Andy and I have always been better together,” Jones agrees.  
  
That doesn’t mean that coming out is suddenly without its risks. The League, though openly espousing tolerance and embracing the few out players in its ranks, is a sprawling organization made up of hundreds of employees and its revenue is in the hands of millions of fans. That’s a lot of minds to change. It’s a daunting prospect, but Jones, Haldane, and the men and women standing in solidarity with them seem up to the task.  
  
As for a measure of the League's progress so far, the numbers don't lie. Jones’s #33 Rougarou jersey, redesigned in the colors of the pride flag, jumped up amongst the top five best-selling hockey jerseys of the season within a week of its unveiling and has maintained its spot on the list. In fact, the whole team donned the famous rainbow for the first game of the Stanley Cup playoffs, where they trounced the Lightning 5-2. Even beyond Jones’s personal contributions to the cause, queer inclusivity in hockey is seeing a long-awaited heyday. You Can Play’s hashtag driven PR campaign, #NHLGBTQ, saw more than 200,000 participants across a variety of social media when it aired in June, and attendance at Hockey Is For Everyone theme nights shot up by more than 15% across the League after Jones, Leckie, and Conley came out.  
  
I ask Jones and Haldane what the future holds—whether Haldane will be signing on with the Rougarou for another year of coaching or shopping his skillset around the League. As a franchise face with three years of play left on his contract, Jones, at least, won’t be going anywhere anytime soon.  
  
“I’ve been in talks with upper management,” Haldane admits. “We told them about our relationship first, in the interest of transparency, and the response has been really good so far. No official word yet, but I’m optimistic.”  
  
Jones and Haldane will also be making an appearance at this year’s Southern Decadence, riding a float sponsored by the You Can Play Organization in partnership with the NHL itself. Though not something that Jones thinks he would have come into had circumstances not forced him, he’s looking forward to representing the queer minority in the NHL at such an auspicious event, even if it’s a lot of pressure to shoulder alone.  
  
“Please,” Haldane snorts. “As if the boys [being their Rougarou teammates] aren’t already planning to crash that party. We’ll be lucky if we have enough elbow room to wave.”  
  
But what about a ring? It’s a logical next step for the NHL’s first—okay, technically second, since Leckie and Conley beat them to the punch—queer power couple. Jones and Haldane will be celebrating their fifth anniversary come October, after all. Plenty of public figures have tied the knot for less.  
  
“We haven’t really talked about that yet,” Haldane says. “I think we’ll probably give things some time to settle, figure out where I’m going to be and what the next few years look like before we put marriage on the table.”  
  
It’s a reasonable response, and certainly a responsible approach to the matter after the whirlwind of the last few months. Haldane delivers it assuredly, too, and I would be inclined to believe him if not for one simple fact:  
  
Over his shoulder, Jones winks at me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seriously, thank y'all so much for reading. <3

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so very much for reading! Expect to see the next chapter up sometime in the next few days, and pray my limited HTML skills don't let me down.
> 
> *If you're curious about the breakdown of my fictional NHL, it looks like this:
> 
>  **9 Pacific teams,** including the future RL Seattle team which I really hope is named the Kraken  
>  **9 Central teams,** including the New Orleans Rougarou, entirely fabricated for use in this fic, and the Alabama Red Tails, likewise fake, and which doesn't see any screen time but I plan to use in later fic  
>  **9 Atlantic teams,** including an unnamed team based out of Georgia  
>  **8 Metropolitan teams,** all real and thus, unexciting


End file.
